This is the discussion cum sharing initiated by our IofC friend,Arbind Seth in our google groups.............
The world is divided into two types of people. Those who push open a door, walk past and let the door slam behind them. That’s about 99% of the population. And there’s the 1% who open the door and hold it open to allow the next person to walk through. Learn to do that, and you could join the select 1% club too.
Holding the door open is not just an act of chivalry, it’s a mindset. It says you care for other people, that you are not so caught up in your own progress that you have scant regard for other folks. It shows that while you may be in a hurry, you still have time for others. It marks you out as a leader who walks faster, pushes ahead, opens doors – but is then mindful of his team, checking their progress, helping them get past barriers. HTDO doesn’t merely make other people feel good. It makes you feel good too.
The habit of holding the door open translates into a behaviour of helping and caring. On the night before the Math exam, you help a friend who is struggling to pass – rather than focusing on scoring an extra mark yourself. The friend will never forget that. At the buffet table, the HDTO habit makes you pick up a plate and offer it to the lady behind you in the queue. The smile you see on her face is quite priceless. Small gestures all – but they make a huge difference. HDTO marks you out as someone special.
Try it. Become a HTDO person. And get the habit that separates winners from losers.
-Arbind seth
Dear All,
A great learning from the mail...
i realised how sometimes i have been tempted "not to hold the door" for my colleague of mine in my office because he/she has been competing with me. Now i realise, doing so i am becoming the part of the similar feeling what i am carrying for them. Probably i am carrying this attitude since i am exibiting in similar manner. And i believe this has happened unconsciously, when my ego, arrogance have over powered my heart. From now on i will definitely remain conscious of it.
Thanks Pinku for such a wonderful mail. Actually this mail gives me a beautiful sight in its own way to look at my attitude and work on that.
Love & Prayer,
Aswini
Got something to learn from this........
thank you dear........
-Sudam swain
When I read this mail from Arbind,I have different stream of thoughts and I remembered an incident where I failed to act properly and where I failed to hold the door open and atleast I didnt open it.
Its May,2009 and at that time I was the facing the worst emotional turm-oil of my life.I was travelling from Vijayawada to khammam in an inter-city express and its over-crowded and I was able to get an half-seat.A lady with his child(around10-12 years) came and stand beside me.There were some bandages on his right hand and burning marks on his hand.I dont remember ,how our conversation started.Some of the co-passengers might have started it and I came to know that the boy is suffering from severe form of jaundice and then I asked him to sit in my lap and his body was so hot and I asked her,if she had any reports.She showed me the reports and its severe form of jaundice and I came to know that they consulted the doctor very late and Dr.Bhargav(I heard much about this doctor and people says that he is not a good doctor) treated him for a while and taken Rs.2000 as fee and after a few days, told them to take away the patient as condition is serious and they have taken this child to some 'lay-man' doctor and he burned his hand at 2/3 places and poured some liquid and told them to pour that liquid for a few more days.
Some of my co-passengers shared their views with her that its not good to follow that treatment as that liquid can be something and something but I really dont know about that procedure or line of treatment but as far as my medical knowledge is concerned,I learned that patient should be treated in humane ways with less pain as far as possible.Some compounder ,who is co-passenger in my train started abusing the concerned doctor and I behaved in the way am half-concerned.
Later,I have given her the phone number of a gastroentrologist in Hyderabad and this is the mistake I have done.Sub-consciously I am half-concerned .I should have given my phone number,not of the doctor and I should have taken their contacts.Its that I'm holding the door but not opening it wide.I would have helped them as I stayed at that time for more than a month.I know a physician,who is my uncle who really treats patients with love,care and affection not giving much importance to money and even sometimes he pays their transport charges,other wise,I would have taken him to a homeopathic trust,which cures with out concerning money.But,I have done a mistake giving them some doctor's phone number in Hyderabad half-mindedly.Their economic condition would have never allowed them to travel again to Hyderabad as she was telling that they spent much and borrowed some money for interest for his treatment but all I was thinking at that time is me,my family.
If I would have given some time of me for that child,he would have survived for sure.I dont know what his condition is now but I wish that boy to be playing some where and it really hurts me whenever,I remember this incident.Before a few days,I learned from one of the promising faces of India that India has potential to form a nation health mission with booming pharmaceutical company and at that time also the boys face came before me questioning me for my careless ness.
Opening the door is as important as to hold it and more over we should act at a moment without any delay and if we fail,it may become too late.
Now I hope that child to survive but I cant hold any more.
-Aravind Thumbur
Dear Aravind,
i also join in prayers with you for the health recovery of that child.
Yes friends, each of us might have come across such situations and might get a learning out of that if we re-visit those incidents.
All the best on being a HTDO person.
Love & Prayer,
Aswini
